A Broken Heart

No update, I dont feel like writing it.  But I did write this just a minute ago, and I want you to tell me what you think of it.  Comments appreciated.  This song is alittle more up-tempo then I usually write, but I like it alot.  It's still in the working stage, and I may make a change or two.  Here it is.

A Broken Heart

Verse 1

I go to sleep to see you;

            In my dreams

I wake up to see you;

            Or so it seems

I wonder what I did wrong

I wonder where we went wrong

I wonder if I’ll see you, again

Chorus:

I cry myself to sleep

            Where did you, where did you go

I close my eyes to see

            But where did you, where did you go

In my heart I’ll keep

            Loving you, loving you so

Verse 2

The alarm clock goes off;

            But you’re not there

Your pretty brown eyes;

            Your ever changing, hair

I wonder what I did wrong

I wonder where we went wrong

I wonder if I’ll see you, again

Chorus:

I cry myself to sleep

            Where did you, where did you go

I close my eyes to see

            But where did you, where did you go

In my heart I’ll keep

            Loving you, loving you so

Bridge:

I miss you baby,

Like Crazy

Why wont you come back, to me

I miss you baby,

Like crazy

Why wont you come back, to me

I wonder what I did wrong

I wonder where we went wrong

I wonder if I’ll see you, again

Chorus:

I cry myself to sleep

            Where did you, where did you go

I close my eyes to see

            But where did you, where did you go

In my heart I’ll keep

            Loving you, loving you so

I cry myself to sleep

            Where did you, where did you go

I close my eyes to see

            But where did you, where did you go

In my heart I’ll keep

            Loving you, loving you so

Please comment.  Thanks.

Where did this come from?

I'm going to make this short.  I know I havnt updated in a long time but I feel that the only thing I can do right now is write in here to keep myself from going insane, so I'll do a quick update on where I have been and what I've been doing. 

We just got back from winning our second championship in a row in indoor soccer.  I love doing it, its fun (but exhausting).  I'm getting better each game although tonight I'll admit I didn't have it in me. 

Finals are over and the summer is here.  I think I did ok in all of my classes.  I finished my finals up today and it feels good to not have to worry about it for three months.  I guess I should register for next semester, although I'm considering taking a semester away from UNT and going to NCTC to get caught up.  I also need to take the GSP test for my major. 

Tonight (besides winning the championship) has been the absolute worst night of my life.  I'm not going to go into details but I'll tell you that I feel like my heart has been ripped from my chest and stepped on.  I know its not on purpose and its noones fault but my own but I just don't want to be anything, anyone or anywhere right now.  I want to lay in my bed, and sleep.  Sleep until this all goes away and I can be happy. 

I remember being happy once.  It was recently.  I'll tell you the story.  Me and Carol had our year anniversary/her birthday thing and it was amazing.  We had a great time.  We were both smiling, happy, in love.  We had a great dinner, we had a great time at the comedy club and then we had a great time at the party (even if she did down an entire bottle of berringer). 

What's it like to be happy?  I need to know.  Like I said, we won the championship tonight in double over time and I barely even clapped.  I couldnt move my arms.  I played like shit tonight.  I couldn't breathe. 

I want to be happy.  That can't be too much to ask?  Can it?

A New Beginning Is Just What I Needed

So times have changed in the past two months.  And yes, I do realize that I probably have lost my entire fan base by not updating for...  ummm 2 months plus?  But thats besides the point.  The point is, is that I have basically quit both of the jobs that I have been slaving at for over a year now and am now working one much easier, as good of pay job.  It feels nice to know that I dont have to worry about getting off with two bitch managers now.  I know when I work all the time and thats that. 

So what I am doing now is basically working for a security company and making sure a security truck gets there and then I drive back.  The only thing that sucks is I go to Tennessee twice a week.  It's going to be nice though because I dont have to worry about working weekends anymore and I only have to work like 3 1/2 days a week.  On top of that, I get like 44 hours a week.  It's going to be nice.  The drive is going to suck, and I realize that... But I also realize how much I hated going to both of my jobs before.  I had to make a leap of faith.  Sure, this probably won't be my career, this probably won't be something that I do for the rest of my life.  But either is waiting tables, and leasing apartments. 

On a more persnonal note, me and Carol are donig great, greater than ever.  We just passed our 10 (official) month anniversary a few days ago and we are going strong for many more months.  It's hard to believe that its already March, and she will be home in 3-5 months.  Considering that she has been gone for 7 now, I can deal with that.  That's only a few more months of driving to do (Driving seems to be the only thing I do now-a-days). 

School is actually going much better than anticipated this semester.  I made an 86 on my hardest test and I'll be damn honest with you, I thought I was going to fail the class.  Lots more hard work to come on it though. 

Ryan's very happy with his new girlfriend, Rachel, and I'll be honest, they are great together.  He kept telling me that she was great and I really like her, she has a great personality and she can stand his often wierd ass.  Good luck man! 

Speaking of those two douches, I'm going to try and get off work today so I can goto a maverick game.  Tomorrow, I have the day off of everything (except my last day at OTB).  I get to wake up late and just not worry about doing ANYTHING.  Sounds so nice right now. 

Well, 5 comments in two months is embarressing at best, so lets beat it this time! 

Cory

1. What did you do in 2005 that you'd never done before?
Fell in love
2. Did you keep your new years' resolutions, and will you make more for next year?
no I didnt keep them and yeah I will
3. Did anyone close to you give birth?
no, but my sister is pregnant and so is both of my brothers wives. 
4. Did anyone close to you die?
actually no.  I just had to help my baby when hers did. 
5. What countries did you visit?
Texas?  Its the closest thing to a country in the U.S
6. What would you like to have in 2006 that you lacked in 2005?
eh, give carol a ring
7. What date from 2005 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?
April 30 The day me and carol finally got together
8. What was your biggest achievement of the year?
holding two jobs, a girlfriend and going to college full time
9. What was your biggest failure?
ummmmm...  ITs been a good year
10. Did you suffer illness or injury?
No
11. What was the best thing you bought?
a new computer
12. Whose behavior merited celebration?
Ok... mine?
13. Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?
Yours?
14. Where did most of your money go?
Gas to drive to College Station to see Carol
15. What did you get really, really, really excited about?
Moving in with Ryan
16. What song will always remind you of 2005?
Hell I dont know?  Bullivard of Broken Dreams ( I hate that fucking song)

17. Compared to this time last year, are you:
     - happier or sadder? Happier.
     - richer or poorer? Way poorer (damn financial aid, or lack there of)
     - thinner or fatter? Gained weight, not fatter
18. What do you wish you'd done more of?
Studying
19. What do you wish you'd done less of?
Being lazy
20. How did you spend the holidays?
With Carol and both of our families
22. Did you fall in love in 2005?
Yes I did 
23. How many one-night stands?
none
24. What was your favorite TV program?
FRIENDS
25. Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?
nopey
26. What was the best book you read?
How to make love like a porn star
27. What was your greatest musical discovery?
Fall out boy
28. What did you want and get?
my girl
30. What was your favorite film of this year?
oh man, 40 year old virgin was great, but Wedding Crashers took the cake
31. What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?
I got PLASTERED.  For free... haha gotta love 21!
32. What one thing would've made your year immeasurably more satisfying?
Carol not leaving
33. How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2005?
jeans and a shirt, unless I'm at work
34. What kept you sane?
my care bear
35. Which celebrity/public figure did you fancy the most?
Angelina Jolie
36. What political issue stirred you the most?
Well its last year but close enough, John Kerry's bitch ass trying to say Bush sucked..  Damn over-liberals. 
37. Who did you miss?
my parents
38. Who was the best new person you met?
lots of folks, I'd say Mike though
39. Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2005.
Long Distance = sucks!  But doable. 

My 2006 Resolution:
1.  Be a better boyfriend and work out more. 

Merry Christmas.... You bastards.

I know I haven't updated in a long ass time, but I promise I will soon.  I don't like to update when no one comments either, because I don't update for myself, I do it for my screaming fans.  But again:

Merry Christmas
Happy Holidays
Happy Kwanzaa
Happy Hanukah
or whatever other crazy things you fuck heads believe in.  Have a good one.